STRESS MANAGEMENT

OR

HOW TO KILL STRESS BEFORE IT KILLS YOU!

What is Stress?

There are many ways to define stress: an applied force or system of forces that tends to strain or deform a body; a state of extreme difficulty, pressure or strain; an automatic reaction to a demand or danger (whether real or perceived) - the "fight or flight" response. Some call it a pressure from the outside that makes you feel tense inside.

However you define it, stress is a fact of life. Some stress is actually helpful: it keeps you on your toes and can spur you on to meet life's challenges. Without some stress, life would be boring, and some of us would never get anything done!

Too much stress, however, can cause problems; it can affect your mental and physical health, and it can damage relationships with family and friends.

Signs and Symptoms of Stress

People experience the symptoms of stress in different ways. Some of the physical symptoms may include: muscle tension, upset stomach, heartburn, sore throat, sinus problems, migraines or tension headaches, sleep difficulty, high blood pressure, menstrual irregularity, constipation, diarrhea, dizziness, fatigue, restlessness, chest pains, shortness of breath, decreased immune system causing increased susceptibility to colds or the flu virus, pain…Health problems can also cause stress.

Some people may experience emotional symptoms of stress: anger, anxiety, denial, depression, difficulty making decisions, loneliness, nervousness, feeling powerless, rejected, trapped, unhappy for no apparent reason, being easily upset, worry…We may find ourselves lashing out at others inappropriately, or withdrawing from family and friends.

Some may experience behavioral signs of stress: increased us of alcohol, drugs, tobacco, neglecting appearance, arguments, avoidance of responsibilities, difficulty concentrating, crying, tardiness, overeating or under eating, snapping at people, watching more TV, withdrawing from family and friends…

Causes of Stress

Some of the external causes of stress include any type of change: personal loss, illness, injury, change in lifestyle, job changes, money or income changes, family changes, retirement. Even positive changes like getting married or having a baby trigger stress in our lives. When changes are sudden, unexpected, too many at once, or disagreeable, this can overwhelm us and trigger stress reactions.

Environmental stressors such as crime, noise, pollution, traffic, and weather are also external sources of stress.

Any time we feel a loss of control can trigger stress, i.e. waiting in lines, being cut off in traffic, the car breaks down. Situations beyond our control can trigger those stress reactions.

Internal causes of stress include: our own negative self-talk. How I react to the external stressor may actually increase the stress I feel. For example: I get stuck in a slow-moving line at the grocery store. If I begin to mentally obsess and wonder "why does this always happen to me, I always pick the slowest checkout", then I begin to feel rushed and anxious. Or, do I choose to use the few extra moments to take a deep breath, imagine something peaceful and relaxing, and thus give myself a brief mental vacation during my busy day.

Coping Strategies to Reduce Stress

Just as the symptoms of stress are different for different people, the coping mechanisms are different as well. Experiment and find what works for you.

1. Develop time management skills to help with work tasks: plan ahead, break big jobs down into smaller components, increase efficiency, take breaks, group similar tasks, schedule work, understand expectations, minimize interruptions, ask for help, get organized, set priorities, remind yourself of your accomplishments, alternate mental and physical tasks, look positively at change instead of fearing it, look back on a crisis as a learning opportunity.

2. Be realistic - keep things in perspective. Ask yourself: what's really important here?

3. Identify what you have control over, and what you don't. Do something about what you have control over, and let go of the stuff you don't have control over.

4. Do something CREATIVE - journaling, music, art, a hobby, develop your sense of play.

5. Do something FUN! - play with your dog or your kids.

6. Develop positive thinking skills.

7. Develop an attitude of gratitude.

8. Develop a strong social support system - and use it! Talk to someone about it. It's ok to ask for help.

9. Develop your problem-solving skills.

10. Practice flexibility - learn to roll with the punches.

11. Develop a spiritual practice.

12. Take action: we often spend more time and energy worrying about "it", than if we "just did it".

13. Give yourself a break - get off your own back. We're usually harder on ourselves that anyone. Build in "time off" for yourself

14. Take care of yourself - physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and socially.

15. Exercise.

16. Get a massage.

17. BREAD - Breathe, Relax, Exercise, practice a positive Attitude, and maintain a healthy Diet.

18. Rest - Even God rested on the 7th day.

19. HALTS - avoid getting too Hungry (physically, emotionally…), Angry, Lonely, Tired, Scared.

20. Serenity Prayer - "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference!"

These are just some suggestions to get you started. There are many resources out there. Check your local library, bookstore, pastor/clergy, counseling center for additional support.